Spring is finally here – flowers are in bloom, the sun is shining, the days are getting longer, animals are emerging from a long sleep. As the grayness of winter recedes, we feminine creatures are coming back to life.

With the winter months being cold and wet, it’s easy to spend a lot of time inside, hiding from the outside world.

After spending time like this we often become more aware of our natural longing for attention – our desire for our beauty to be seen and appreciated. It’s perfectly natural, especially as women, to want this. Though it can be vulnerable to admit!

When we don’t receive the attention we want from others, it’s easy to feel invisible. Luckily, as spring comes, there are opportunities all around you to be seen and appreciated! Once you start paying attention, you’ll see how enlivened you can feel moment to moment. Read the rest of this entry »

Have you been stuck in the “Friend Zone?” You probably know what I mean, but let me paint a picture:

You have men in your life, some of them very attractive, but they don’t even try to ask you out. They’ll take you out for a beer, and then talk about the gorgeous co-worker they have their eye on. They come to you for dating advice, but not for a date. You’re cute, funny, and down-to-earth, so what’s the deal?

Believe me, I know the feeling. Years ago, I was “The Friend.” I spent lots of time with men – actually, I always had more male friends than girlfriends – but that’s just it: they always remained friends.

Sometimes it seemed like all the cute men in my life were looking over my shoulder, at some woman across the room. I wanted to wave my hands in front of them and say, “Hello-o, I’m here too,” but that would have been mortifying. Read the rest of this entry »

Ah, the beginning of another new year. You probably have a list of resolutions, or at least hopes for 2010. You’ll do some spring-cleaning, finally organize your closet, eat healthier… and maybe, finally, you’ll meet the guy of your dreams.

But this year, instead of just hoping you’ll meet him, let’s do something different: let’s assume you will.

Close your eyes and imagine that you know, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that the perfect guy is waiting right around the corner.

I know what you’re thinking. “Okaaay… that’s great, but I don’t actually know I’m going to meet him. So what’s the point of getting my hopes up?” This exercise takes a little bit of creativity, so bear with me. When you live as if you know you will meet him, your life will change for the better. Read the rest of this entry »

I’ve seen so many holiday greetings this year and I honestly started to feel intimidated. I wondered if i could send a holiday greeting that would mean as much to you as the others I’ve read.

I often wonder things like this. Will I do it as well as s/he did? Will I be as attractive, as eloquent, as clear, as powerful, as inspiring…?

And then I think that if I’m not, it may be time for me to give up, or not even pursue something in the first place!

Then I noticed a weight in my chest and a tiredness in my shoulders. And I remembered how many women I’ve heard talk about this fear. Read the rest of this entry »

Have you ever woken up in the middle of the night and started worrying about a relationship or your job and then you can’t get back to sleep? I’ve had that happen a lot!

A while ago, I woke up and started thinking about my husband. At first, they were random, dreamy thoughts. Nothing too specific – just scenes of our time together floating through my mind.

Then, I thought to myself, “hmmm… he hasn’t said ‘I love you,’ in a while.” I thought some more about it. He’s told me I amaze him and that he’s grateful to be with me, but not ‘I love you.’ And, my mind went to that Bad Place:

Maybe it’s a big deal…I should tell him I love him, it goes both ways…I wonder whether he will fall out of love with me some day. Most relationships are destined for failure these days. I’d rather him tell me he doesn’t love me now than years from now. It would hurt a lot less. Read the rest of this entry »

Have you ever had a string of really great luck, where the world seems to fall at your feet? Gorgeous men are suddenly everywhere, flirting with you and asking you if you’re free on Saturday night. The same week, you get a raise and compliments at work. You feel like you’re on top of the world, and the luck just keeps coming.

Or, you get the opposite:  everything falls apart and it all happens at once. You lose your job, your pet iguana dies, and the cute guy you’ve been seeing says he needs a break. I’ve been in this boat many times. I’m sure you have too.

Imagine you have a beautiful gift basket, full of money, wonderful food, and the promise of love. You have been told to choose one very special and deserving woman to give this gift to.

The first woman walks into the room, and you tell her you would like to give her this gift. She crosses her arms, raises an eyebrow, and says “Huh. Why? I haven’t done anything to deserve this. There must be something you’re not telling me.” Read the rest of this entry »

The other day I turned a connection with my man that was about to go bad into a heart melting and healing experience.

You too can turn a connection that’s more shallow or disconnected than you want, whether with a new man or a man you’re in relationship with, into one that is deep, builds trust, and even sparks attraction and passion!

Here’s how it went for me:

San Francisco, California
10:00 pm after a long day of work

I had worked all day and was recuperating from leading a workshop. At 10:00 I’m laying on the couch feeling exhausted. Read the rest of this entry »

This is a great article written by a friend of mine, Jayson Gaddis, who teaches men how to be powerful and achieve their highest purpose. I am inspired by his work, his commitment and his authenticity!

I love this article because it’s honest. It explains what men often go through. And because it asks men to call their  fantasies into question and look deeper. We need to do this as women as well.

He suggests that men… Read the rest of this entry »

Walking into a café, bar or party, my mind often buzzes with questions about myself. Am I dressed okay? Am I as radiant as the other women here? Will men pay attention to me? At this point, I don’t take these thoughts too seriously.  A few years ago they sometimes paralyzed me. I felt nervous and anxious.

But guess what? The men I coached today told me the same thing happens for them! It is such a privilege to be let into hundreds of men’s insecurities and vulnerabilities. And so you know, I haven’t yet met a man who doesn’t have them. It’s so easy to think you’re the only one who is nervous, but it’s not true. Read the rest of this entry »